Welcome to my blog “All Sorrows Borne.” The title is from a quote by Isak Dinesen “All sorrows can
be borne if you tell them in a story or tell a story about them.”

MOST RECENT POST

Christmas or New Year composition with cocoa, marshmallows, gingerbread cookies and christmas decorations

“May we do something from my culture today?” our Japanese daughter-in-law asked us last Christmas day. “On holidays, we take food to the cemetery and leave it on the graves of our relatives.” And so we did. We loaded up the cars and drove to the … [Read More...]

FEATURED POSTS

Christmas or New Year composition with cocoa, marshmallows, gingerbread cookies and christmas decorations

A Cookie on Christmas Day

“May we do something from my culture today?” our Japanese daughter-in-law asked us last Christmas day. “On holidays, we take food to the cemetery and leave it on the graves of our relatives.” And so we did. We loaded up the cars and drove to the … [Read More...]

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Both And

I hear confusion from those who grieve in this holiday season because they experience conflicting emotions. The collision between the expectations of holiday happiness and the personal reality of grief can create confusion. “My feelings go back and … [Read More...]

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What Do I Say?

Dear Readers, This post is longer than usual but due to a recent news event, I wanted to offer some specific ideas about how to respond to the bereaved. President Trump recently asked his Chief of Staff the question "What do I say?" as he … [Read More...]

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Disenfranchised Grief

“I am so embarrassed,” a client said recently. “My dog died, and I called into work sick for three days. I know so many people who have had real tragedies in their life, and I can’t get it together to get to work because my dog died. I really feel … [Read More...]

SeekAndAvoid

Seek and Avoid

A widowed person recently said to me, “I just don’t want to do this. It hurts too much. I binge watch television, eat comfort food, and try to sleep a lot but I know I am only buying time until the pain returns.” Our basic nature is simple – we … [Read More...]