Welcome to my blog “All Sorrows Borne.” The title is from a quote by Isak Dinesen “All sorrows can
be borne if you tell them in a story or tell a story about them.”

MOST RECENT POST

A silhouette of someone in despair on a bench against the setting sun

A bereaved father whose daughter died in a car accident described an experience to me that frightened him. “It was a surge of feelings that started in my feet and traveled through my whole body and came out in a primal sound that did not seem like my … [Read More...]

FEATURED POSTS

A silhouette of someone in despair on a bench against the setting sun

No Words

A bereaved father whose daughter died in a car accident described an experience to me that frightened him. “It was a surge of feelings that started in my feet and traveled through my whole body and came out in a primal sound that did not seem like my … [Read More...]

Baby hand holding mother's hands

Continuing Bonds

In a bereaved parents’ meeting, I recently spoke about the desire many parents have to continue the emotional bond with their children who have died. The signs of relief were audible. “I am tired of the pressure to ‘get over’ the death of my … [Read More...]

Christmas or New Year composition with cocoa, marshmallows, gingerbread cookies and christmas decorations

A Cookie on Christmas Day

“May we do something from my culture today?” our Japanese daughter-in-law asked us last Christmas day. “On holidays, we take food to the cemetery and leave it on the graves of our relatives.” And so we did. We loaded up the cars and drove to the … [Read More...]

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Both And

I hear confusion from those who grieve in this holiday season because they experience conflicting emotions. The collision between the expectations of holiday happiness and the personal reality of grief can create confusion. “My feelings go back and … [Read More...]

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What Do I Say?

Dear Readers, This post is longer than usual but due to a recent news event, I wanted to offer some specific ideas about how to respond to the bereaved. President Trump recently asked his Chief of Staff the question "What do I say?" as he … [Read More...]